Maybe This Time

Last night I experienced something that I have dreamed about since I was just a hatchling of a homosexual, listening to my Sarah Brightman records in my bedroom and singing into a microphone (flashlight). I saw Liza Minnelli perform live onstage. I saw THE Liza Minnelli perform live onstage, not 50 feet away from me at Town Hall in NYC. Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

10 Things I Hate About… Well, Nothing at the Moment

I think we can all agree that the Oscars has always been about getting dressed up, getting misty watching our favorite artists win awards, then going in the bathroom and crying in the mirror while you thank your audience (read: your cat) for “this prestigious award”. At least, this is what my Oscar night usually entails. Along with three or four generous slices of chocolate cake.

Well last night’s Oscar telecast was, in many ways, no different. The stars were beautiful, and so many talented people were honored for their exceptional work this year- including my girl Adele. I may not always understand what she’s saying, but as Michele Visage would say, I can always be sure it was eloguent.

I couldn’t help, though, feeling something slightly different last night as the Oscars came to a close and Seth McFarlane sang that awkward song with Kristin Chenoweth (seriously- more uncomfortable than Chris Brown at The Vagina Monologues). Amidst the usual feelings of hopefulness, fulfillment, reassurance, and motivation, I also found myself feeling a bit guilty. It should be noted that I am no stranger to feelings of guilt- there is a box of Entenmann’s chocolate donuts sitting on the counter, so there is sure to be more of those feelings in the not-so-distant future. Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

The Ballad of the Restaurant Host

It is quiet.
Too quiet.
Where is she?
She is never late-
Prompt to a fault.
To the point where her absence is so strongly felt
That I am frantic;
In a word, lost, without her. Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged | Leave a comment

Sit Down, You’re Rockin’ the Yacht

Something has been on my mind recently that I thought would be good fodder for discussion. It is a topic that every actor, director, playwright, and schizophrenic is forced to face on a daily basis- the topic is my mind. Well, not my mind… Our minds!

I know you’re thinking, “My mind is quite healthy, thank you very much. I read Dr. Oz’s most recent book and I do yoga twice a year.” At least, that’s what you’re thinking if you keep my schedule, but you’d have to throw in a few trips to McDonald’s and the sections of Park Slope normally reserved for the criminally insane to compete with me.

Well if you’re anything like me, (and why shouldn’t you be?) you have definitely had a few mornings where you wake up, brush the Doritos out of your chest hair, and look dazedly into the bathroom mirror, asking, “What’s wrong with me?” Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Look At Me, I’m Sandra Dee…

… Lousy with humidity. Won’t go away til I’ve ruined your day- I can’t, I’m Sandra Dee!

I know, not my best work, but this hurricane has rattled my brain. I’m going insane. It’s plain to see I’m drained. WHY am I rhyming? Cause I’ve got a case of cabin fever so bad even that virus in Contagion is like “eNOUGH. This is serious…” Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The Origin of Love

“I could tell by your expression that the pain down in your soul was the same as the one down in mine.”
-The Origin of Love, Hedwig and the Angry Inch Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

My Kick in the Ass. I Mean, Kickstarter.

When I started writing my cabaret (That’s Not Right… A Mistaken Cabaret at the Duplex Cabaret Theatre, Saturday, November 3rd at 6:30pm) so long ago, I knew that there would be challenges. I knew that I would have to transpose and arrange music. I knew that I would have to find an accompanist. I knew that I would have to write the entire thing in my underwear on the couch with cookie crumbs matted in my chest hair. What I did not know was that I was going to pay for my actions. Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

That’s Not Right… A Mistaken Cabaret

What do you get when you add a frighteningly large collection of showtunes, a stage, a piano, and a gay man with a lot of heart and sass?

Well, you get Liza Minnelli. But if you look right behind her and just a hair to the left, you get Joe D’Angio! And because I’ve got a little heart and a lot of sass, I am making my solo cabaret debut in That’s Not Right… A Mistaken Cabaret at the Duplex Cabaret Theatre on Saturday, November 3rd at 6:30pm! Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Letter to the Editor

Today while I was perusing my favorite news channel (aka my Facebook newsfeed) I noticed an article published by a fellow blogger. I should start off by clarifying that this person is at best an acquaintance, but a very nice girl. I have never found her to be mean-spirited or unintelligent, and she is (as far as I’ve seen) reasonably talented. Have you deduced yet that I am not referencing Sarah Palin? Good. Let’s move forward.

BUT (and it’s a big one. Like OPRAH big) I could not help but feel offended by the aforementioned post. Actually, the last few blog posts/Facebook statuses I’ve read of hers have put me a bit on edge, and I think this entry is fueled in part by my edginess… That makes sense, right? Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

But Let Me Tell You Why…

I’m cranky! I’m a cranky person. It’s no secret- my family knows it, my boyfriend knows it, even my agent knows it. And do you know why? Because I’m performing in a Cranky Cabaret, that’s why!

So this Friday and Saturday, May 25th and 26th, I will be performing in Cranky Cabaret at Joria Studios (260 W. 36th Street, 3rd Floor). I will be singing my cranky heart out about what it’s like to be a gay caveman, sleep with a Republican, and live life as an asshole. The show starts at 8:00pm both nights, so bring ten friends, and tell them you came to see me… cause I might get a portion of the ticket sales if you do! Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments